I. Hate. Potty. Training.
As in, I hate it. More than anything.
It is the one thing in parenting that frustrates me more than anything.
Let's start with Caleb.
I felt pressured to start potty training him when he was 2 and a 1/2. A couple of people around me made me feel like it needed to be done. One day, I started trying. It was the worst two days of my life. In tears, I called a dear friend who has potty trained her six children. Her advice: "Either Caleb isn't ready or you aren't ready, so just stop. Try again in a few months."
I don't think either of us was ready. I was not ready for the commitment (it's a big undertaking, especially since I like to keep a full social schedule). Caleb did not seem to be grasping it. I know it was only two days, but he was making zero progress. When I decided to wait, a huge burden was lifted. That was the moment I realized I was trying to please those pressuring me, rather than do what I wanted to do. Brett, fortunately, was supportive, no matter what I chose.
Right after returning from a vacation over Christmas Break, we started potty training again (and the same day broke Chloe of her pacifier...apparently, we were crazy). Caleb was potty trained (during the day) within a day or two.
Except for #2.
Oh my, that was the worst. He would not going #2 in the toilet. He would wait until bedtime when he had a diaper on to go. Or go in his pants, but he usually waited. No matter what I would do, he would not go in the toilet. This went on for about nine months. Then, all of a sudden, one day, he just decided to go. And never had another accident. A few days after this feat, he told me he was done wearing his diaper at night. He was! That surprised me. After 9 months of frustration, he was fully potty trained.
Then it was time to potty train Chloe.
Well, actually, before her second birthday, she started training on her own. She loved using the potty and was quite good at it. Then a few weeks after turning 2, she got really sick and without going into detail, diapers were much easier. So, she regressed. But I was 5 months pregnant at the time, so quite honestly, I did not have it in me to potty train her.
A few weeks before Luke's birth, we were stuck at home for weeks on end with a horrible snow storm. I got a wild hair to potty train her before his arrival. So stupid, in hindsight, but I did it.
And she did fantastic. Except that soon after potty training, she began having accidents (maybe once or twice a day). Going on a year now, she consistently struggles with accidents. She goes #2 fine (ironically but thankfully), but she pees in her panties at least once a day.
I have tried everything. Bribes. Rewards. Consequences. Taking away privileges. NOTHING works. To add to it, she doesn't mind sitting in wet panties (but I don't let her since it can cause an infection).
I am at a total loss. Maybe like Caleb, she will one day just get it. I can't tell if she is just lazy about going or if something is wrong. A family member of mine has a very small bladder (like, medically, not being funny), so maybe she inherited that??
I welcome any and all advice. I thought training girls was supposed to be easier. But it seems that potty training is a thorn in my side.
My kids do so many things well, and I feel very fortunate that parenting, for the most part, has gone well. This, however, is a huge source of frustration to me.
I know one day I will look back on this and laugh. But for now, I am at a loss.