My BFF and I laughed earlier this week how kids have an awesome way of keeping us humble. Her daughter and Chloe had the funniest kid conversation ever.....the kind you can only laugh about with your closest friend.
I should have sensed the foreshadowing that was about to take place, because I had quite a week. So, in case you're having a bad week, I wanted to let you know you're in good company.
Here is a recap of my week's highlights:
- A certain toddler of mine had the most epic tantrum of my motherhood experience in, of all places, IKEA! If you've been to Ikea, you know it's an absolute maze. Imagine navigating that maze with a screaming toddler who will not stay in his stroller seat, so you're holding him while he hits and bites you between screams.....while carrying a large easel for your young artists. I proceeded to have the slowest cashier ever, and the people in front of me tried paying in Euros. So, yeah, that was awesome.
- To make it even better, somewhere between the park and Ikea, I lost one of his shoes (his only pair of nice shoes). So screaming, out of control toddler was missing a shoe. Which Every. Single. Person. In. Ikea. pointed out to me.
(We live far from Ikea but met friends at a park close to Ikea....so I stopped in "quickly"....ignoring my gut feeling that my kids were too tired.)
- One nameless child peed on his sister during a bath. I know what you're thinking, "Give us more advice on how to win the mother of the year award, Sarah. You seem to be nailing this parenting gig."
- The same nameless child completely missed the toilet when going not #1. Obviously he misses EVERYTIME going #1. But this time was infinitely grosser. (In full disclosure, my hero of a husband cleaned it all up).
- On two different days, lunch consisted of "eat anything you find because I am too worn out to think of food for the 4000th time this week." Which one of the days consisted entirely of dessert.
- A certain almost 2 year old is cutting his molars, so he hasn't slept through the night all week. Considering I didn't sleep through the night for the better part of 5 years, you would think this would not effect me. But, oh my gosh, once you've slept through the night, there's no going back. (Moms of infants, I love you.....and you will sleep again.....you shouldn't be reading this anyway, because almost nothing is harder than an infant not sleeping through the night. So feel free to yell at your computer that I have no right to complain about not sleeping for 6 whole days.)
There were a few other interesting moments sprinkled throughout the week, but those were the highlights.
Lest you feel terrible for me (you should because GOSH, it was a long week), I must disclose that yesterday afternoon, my incredible husband saved the day. Because his gesture was grand and sweet (and saved me from en epic meltdown. I had already melted down, I was just reaching threat levels), I must publicly thank him. He called me from work, letting me know he had scheduled a girls night with a sweet friend of mine....told me he would have the house cleaned when I returned.....then showed up after work with a fountain Diet Coke.
Soooooo my hilariously horrible week ended very well.
To conclude, disregard any advice I've ever given on parenting. Because I obviously have no idea what I am talking about. Just ask the 452 people who had the pleasure of shopping at Ikea on Wednesday.